Do we expect too much or too little for our elderly loved ones?

Shannan Mosley

Director and CEO

Lots Of Love Home Care Agency, LLC

2800 Glades Circle

Suite # 128

Weston, FL 33327

954-500-LOVE (5683)

As our parents enter their later years, frequently, we feel like we know exactly what they need. Sometimes we dismiss our parents’ wants even when they outwardly express them to us. We decide to take on the role of sole decision-maker. Taking over all of their affairs may seem like the right thing to do, but it may not be necessary. Not all people age the same way. One person may need more physical assistance while their mind is still sharp or vice versa. During many conversations with my elderly clients, a few patterns have emerged. An overwhelming number have told me that they genuinely want better communication, respect, love and involvement when it comes to the relationship with their caregivers and/or family. In addition, they just want to feel needed. My grandmother says, “Understand that I’m still an adult. Treat me as such. You cannot just come and change my life without talking to me. “ She reminds me that this is her life and is still capable of making choices. Our loved ones do not want to be a burden; instead, they desire to feel needed, as they were for so many years prior. Even if your parent cannot pay his bills, give him some kind of financial independence. It’s important for him to feel useful because feeling useless or burdensome may lead to depression. Depression in seniors can lead to isolation and eventually giving up. Instead of adding stress or pressure, allow your loved one to age gracefully. Listen to them. Even when it’s challenging, remember they were there for you not too long ago. And hopefully one day you will be in a similar position and want someone to treat you with kindness and respect that you deserve as well.

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